Hyperemesis Gravidarum: What You Shouldn’t Say.
Here are the top 5 statements that got under my skin:
- “It’s morning sickness, you’ll feel great by the second trimester. Just eat some soda crackers and drink ginger ale.” According to Help HER, roughly 1-3% of pregnant women are diagnosed with Hyperemesis Gravidarum (HG), suffering mild to severe symptoms. If I had just “morning sickness”, I wouldn’t be thirty pounds down in a month, I wouldn’t make hospital visits or be admitted. I wouldn’t need medication or be connected to a subcutaneous pump. But guess what, a drop of water and just the smell of food forced bloody bile out of my stomach every hour to the hour. No cracker or ginger ale stabilized my symptoms. I had to quit working and had my mom temporarily move in with me because I was unable to take care of myself. I felt useless, depressed, and questioned terminating the pregnancy. Even now at almost 27 weeks and way past the second trimester, it’s not completely gone. But YOU ARE RIGHT, it’s just morning sickness.
- “How could you take medication? The baby will be born with a defect!” Please keep your opinions to yourself. The last thing a malnourished, weak, and dehydrated HG momma wants to hear is how selfish she is by a taking a medication that has been approved by her medical team. One thing is for sure, I have an amazing doctor, who cares of about my well-being as well as my unborn child. I don’t know any woman, who would purposely want to risk their child’s health. Truth is, birth defects can happen with or without medication.
- “You don’t have cancer. People die everyday.” I’m in no way, shape, or form comparing my HG journey with that of cancer or any other illness, for that matter. I have a family fully affected by multiple diseases especially with my own beautiful mother being a breast cancer survivor. However, this is my journey and has been the most difficult experience I have gone through, please respect that.
- “At least you can have a baby, many women can’t. Be grateful”. How does my suffering and sharing my story make me ungrateful of experiencing life’s greatest miracle? Whether you have been affected by HG or know someone who does, you know how debilitating it is. Us HG mommas are not ungrateful in any way but are looking for some compassion, understanding, and advocacy. My heart hurts knowing there are many women who cannot bare their own child BUT again, this is my story on what has affected me emotionally, physically, and professionally.
- “Its mental.” Even though a positive mindset can help, Hyperemesis Gravidarum is a real condition.
Despite the hardships of HG, we find the strength to keep going, with many women willing to endure the struggle for multiple pregnancies. I know of many women who have suffered much more severely than I have and have continued on because the end result is far greater. I cannot wait to meet my baby for the first time, I know he will be the biggest blessing in my life.
For more information on Hyperemesis Gravidarum, please visit Help HER Foundation.
Has a family member, friend, medical professional, or even stranger made a statement that truly upset you? Comment below 🙂
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